I Wanna Be Sedated
March 26th, 2003Ok, let me apologize for the spite-fueled previous entry. Blood was pumping, rage was seething, steam was furiously blowing out of my ears. I’m sorry ya’ll had to witness that shit, I tend to get a little bit dramatic sometimes… But I have had a good nap and am feeling all kinds of rested and serene. Also, there are some spicy chicken cutlets roasting in the oven, a bigass mug of iced tea at my right, and I’m listening to some old school Coldplay. Things are better, thanks much (cuz I know you were all just fucking worried to hell over it 
). I am still not happy about my job though, that place is working my every last nerve and it was just a matter of time before it made me lose my mind up in here, up in here. Whatever, I’m working tonight and then I’m off for the next two days. This is a scary time to be unemployed, kids… our war-riddled economy sucks. I hate it with the burning passion of a thousand STD’s. [Note to self: look into getting prozac]
I have to find a cool job like my friend UKMatt. The boy sits around designing web graphic shit and reviewing video games all day, then he goes out and wanders the polychromatic streets of swinging London. It kills me. IT KILLS ME.
I am curiously anxious to go see that anime movie Spirited Away. It just won an Oscar for something, which I think is pretty damn cool. The cartoon world is all about CGI lately, so I’m happy somebody got recognized for doing it the old school way. It’s being released in theaters this Friday and I really wanna check it… I’m still kicking myself for not going to see Metropolis. Oh, and is it sad that I am mildly atingle about the all day Clueless marathon coming up? That movie was the shit back in high school, ppl were all just fixated on it. They’d rent it and have it playing on loop @ various house parties throughout the year. I liked the show. That mean redheaded girl was my favorite, she’s always my favorite. Serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer.
Shit. I just rememberd I need to get my taxes done. Must call my guy @ H&R Block and get that taken care of. I owed major money last year b/c I’d failed to fill out my tax forms properly when I’d signed with my temp agency. (It never occured to me that the reason my paychecks were so large was b/c I was getting NO state/city taxes taken from them). I have since filed shit properly this time and should have a nice little refund this year. One of the cool things about being an actor? You get to make all kinds of deductions (movies, CD’s, haircuts, gym memberships, cellphone, cable TV, etc.) and they are completely legit write-off’s b/c they are basically “research tools” that contribute to your profession. For awhile, I thought I wouldn’t be able to do that this year but, as it turns out, it’s all kizza. Let the refund begin!
For the record, I so could have played the role of that geeky high school film student on Dawson’s Creek (shut up, I have to get my Michelle Williams/Kerr Smith on — I swear, those two are the only things about that show that sort of resemble what it used to be about: young dumb white kids. Everybody else tries to act all old, tired, and world weary. Reflective and shit, like they’ve just seen it all by the age of 20 and just barely been through it. Fuck you, poseurs). No, for real, where do they hold auditions for these bit roles? I have got to get a commercial agent. That messy haired, thick glasses-wearing, guitar-loving, bumbling persona is NOT hard to portray and I could have done it ten times better than the hack they cast. I can totally be a nerd, as you ppl can attest.
By the way? new polls are up.
“Union! Union!”
March 25th, 2003So I’m a little bit heated. Here’s why:
I stroll into work this early evening and a manager, Johnson (b/c he’s a dick), informs me that the overnight guy called out sick and they want me to stay and work a double shift tonight (that means 5pm – 7am). He asked me with a straight face and tried to convince me that it’d be good overtime. That’s when I pointed out that they CUT my hours this week and that even if I chose to stay and pull an extra shift, it would NOT be overtime pay but merely add up to the proper 40hrs they were supposed to schedule me for in the first place. Then he actually had the cojones to try to bargain with me like we were in Chinatown, like my availability is negotiable, like I’m some desperate little vagabond just DYING for a chance to prove my worth and loyalty to him and the company. *sigh* Maybe it was b/c I was raised a certain way, maybe it’s b/c I feel a deep commitment to keeping ppl impressed, or maybe it’s just b/c I’m a damn fool… but I begrudgingly agreed to stay till 3am.
- Around 12am, he strolls out to the front desk and basically begs me to stay the full shift. I said I’d do it only if they got MY shift covered the following night. He wouldn’t do that. I suggested he come up with a better offer otherwise I’d still be rolling up outta there @ 3am.
- 12:45am hits and I am told that it’s all taken care of and that I can leave @ 1:30am (the ORIGINAL end of my shift) after all. I am assured that Johnson will just stay on through the night to cover the overnight guy. I couldn’t help but chuckle at how lame this whole thing was getting.
- 1:30am rolls around and Johnson tries to get me to stay till 7am AGAIN, this time offering to send me home in the morning and pay for my cab. It was not a “Meet me halfway, here” kind of thing. It was presented as more of a “Would you just fucking quit being so difficult, already” scenario. There was a definate Tone.
I’m not sure what exactly triggered it, but I pretty much let all my thoughts loose. Everything just began flooding furiously out of my mouth — how lame it is that they expect me to be able to BE READY to work past my schedule when they decide they want me to and then wanna get pissed when I say no, how fucked up it is that they STILL have me on the overnights when it was supposed to be a fucking FOUR WEEK THING, what a joke it is that they took 1.5 months to activate my pay increase, how illegal it is that I have yet to see my Retroactive Backpay, and how tonight’s dillemma should be an exploding sign to them that we are seriously understaffed and need more GUYS working the desk. Johnson just stared at me blankly, “Chris, do you know what my title is?” 
He then went on to list off all of his various titles, subtitles, and other shit that didn’t matter, only to bottom line it with: “… so do you really think that the biggest concern on the company’s mind is to hire a new person for the front desk?” “Apparently not,” I replied. ”So can you stay? Yes or no?” “I’m sorry but no,” I replied flatly. He just shrugged and was like, “Fine. I’ll stay for you.” “WHAT?!” I practically laughed. “I’ll stay for you,” he repeated with this glare of dissapproval. ”You’re not staying for me,” I clarified. “You’re staying for Robbie. HE is the one who called out sick, remember? HE is the one who is supposed to be here.” Then, he (my manager) gave me the gayest little Look and said, “Ok well just remember, the next time you need something, don’t come asking me.” 
That’s when I grabbed my coat, locked up my cash bank, and clocked the fuck out of that place. I’m sorry, but scare tactics have zero effect on me. Try using that game on somebody who’s in awe of your shit.
The ironic part is that it is now the wee hours of the morning (damn near 5am) and I am sitting up, wide awake, just typing this entry. I totally could have made it through that shift at work… but I was not about to have ppl thinking that I’m a fucking lackey who’s gonna stay and work back-to-back with NO INCENTIVE to do so other than the useless fact that you want me to. Yes, I probably could have handled myself better and not been such a dramaqueen (the scene wasn’t as confrontational as I probably make it sound…) but I feel like I broke some new ground tonight @ work. Got all Norma Rae and shit. I’m glad I said no, b/c I have gone that route before (been the good old standby) and it is not fucking worth it. All you get is a “Thanks a lot, Chris” and maybe a nod/wink of approval… and then you become the first person they come to everytime they need somebody to do something that that nobody else will do.
And furthermore, I will not be coerced into bearing the title of “Non Team Player” for this shit, either. I have gone plenty an extra mile @ Hudson, put up with way too many excuses regarding my pay delays and paycheck fuckups, as well as covered many an extra shift (hell, I am picking up an extra shift this Sunday for that same damned overnight kid so he can go to some family thing). The fact that I wouldn’t work a 14hr shift when it wouldn’t be overtime pay or payoff for me the next day with extra time off? that’s not weird! That’s not me being uncool or stubborn — that’s me NOT being your bitch. That’s me refusing to be obligated to a job that will only begin to demand those same things on a regular basis.
No thanks, you can keep your “Bad Employee of the Month” dunce cap. I will not be wearing it. 
Herding In the Streets
March 24th, 2003This whole war thing makes my head hurt. I tuned into the Oscars last night, hoping to find some escape in the sea of pretention and snobbery that it usually is, yet was faced with nothing but acceptance speech after acceptance speech loaded with WAR commentary. What the?! This isn’t CNN, dammit! I’m so sick of everybody talking about it, so I’m gonna quit right now. My favorite part of the Oscars, though? when Gael Garcia Burnal came out there, all smoldering and sexy @ a mere 5’6″ and totally had the audience eating out of his hand. Panties actually hit the auditorium floor, it was in the closed captioning. What a rockstar. I want us to be cousins or something. Like, I want us to meetup @ family barbecues and then ditch it all and go cruising at the mall all day or something (hey, we’re both Mexican — it could totally be possible). Y Tu Mama Tambien was a HUGE favorite of mine last year, like totally in my top 5. I thought all three of the leads were good but something about him really stood out, his presence is just amazing. I was literally hanging onto every bit of broken English that he uttered from the stage last night. His newer movie looked really good, too, it’s saved on my Netflix list. Nothing but praise for this kid, gotta keep the love strong for us little Mexican guys. 
So, both the IFC and Sundance have been showing all of their “Best Of” movies lately. In one weekend I watched Riders, Chuck & Buck, and The Fluffer —- it damn near killed me. There are some HEAVY MOVIES out there, man! Doesn’t anybody make happy films anymore?! For real, it’s just been too fucking much on my emotions. Last night, I was channel surfing and caught the first 20 minutes of Waiting to Exhale and I damn near had a nervous breakdown. All the beautiful black women crying and being mistreated, the Mary J. Blige vocals wailing in the background from soulful R&B soundtrack…. dear Lord, please end all this suffering!
I bought some more pillows recently, which brings a total of six to my bed. Two bigass body ones, plus four regular ones. I feel like a sultan or someshit. The servant girls with the fans and grapes will be arriving as soon as my next paycheck clears. No, I’m not kidding.
My pal Rae just mailed me a mixed CD! Note to all of you: Spriteboy FLOVES mixed CD’s! Getting them, making them, you name it. I especially like putting really random shit on there and following it up with even more random shit. Like, start the CD off with a track by Coldplay (cuz it’s just NECESSARY), juxtapose into ”California Love” by 2Pac, and then follow that up with “9 to 5″ by Dolly Parton. Gives me a little hee! (doesn’t take much, folks). But anyway, this mixed CD from my friend kicks ass! I’ve been listening to it all weekend. It rocks, so does she, and so does her photography. Check her mess.
By the way how much does everybody in the world wish to God that
When It Dies Down
March 23rd, 2003I’m adding this entry from work tonight/early morning (tomorrow?). Standing here at the front desk, I’m amazed that I’m even able to get online, much less add a post to my website. It’s DEAD up in this mother tonight, which is strange b/c we’re nearly sold out. I love it when this place is quiet and peaceful, it’s like the dragon is resting or something.
I spent the day with M&J, who suprisingly never beat me up the way they should for constantly being late and holding up our plans for WHATEVER by at least 45 minutes (I’m not convinced that a good, solid asskickin’ isn’t lurking around the corner, though). They understand and accept that I am a modern day vampire, and that to ask me to rise from my precious slumber anytime before dusk is simply a joke. We schlepped our mugs out to Queens for yet another Target experience. Had a really fun time, they keep me in stitches. Doing anything with these two cackling harpies is like riding shotgun next to Goldie Hawn and Meryl Streep when they were rivals in Death Becomes Her. Remember that last scene in the movie, where it’s like WAY AFTER they reconciled their differences and are like these two aging lumps of clay that won’t fucking die? And they’re at that funeral, sitting in the back row of the church, snarking the hell out of the dead guy and just laughing their asses off. That’s basically a good description of M&J. With friends like these, who needs enemies? I both cherish and fear them. At Target, I stocked up on more incense and candles b/c I just am feeling like a bigass hippie lately, and the shit there is so cheap and compact that I can never refuse. I am obsessed with getting things @ a steal, even if I don’t need it. If something is under $3, I will buy it, doesn’t even matter what the damn thing is.
So, those little sculptures I stumbled upon @ 14th Street? Turns out they’re part of an exhibit entitled “Life Underground” by this Witchita-based artist named Tom Otterness. Apparently, he has some other cool stuff on display @ the Marlborough Gallery in Chelsea, so I’m gonna have to check that out too. Big props to my bud BoyWonderKyle, who clued me in on this info. Kyle’s blog is one of my daily stops online, his artwork is cute as hell and he’s actually gonna draw some new graphics and logos for my site… b/c apparently, my font is too amateur looking and I am “far too cool for that mess.” Heh, right.
A presumabley cute girl stopped me @ Target today and asked me where we keep the pet supplies. “Oh I’m sorry, I don’t work here,” I said politely. She looked me up and down and goes, “You look like you work here.” The sad part was, she was totally right. I glanced down at my red shirt and khaki cargo pants for a second and then, regaining some attitude, stood a little bit taller in my shoes and gave her the I Am Not Impressed By Your Bitchiness face, “Well I obviously don’t.” We stood there for a short moment and just eyed each other down, then went about our seperate and forever distant ways. It was a really weird, animousity-filled exhcange. We’d totally fallen in and out of love with each other in just those 8 seconds.
It Boy Aspirations
March 22nd, 2003So, it’s official: the kids @ Pavement Studios flove me. I GOT CAST!!! 
The only question that remains now is… in WHICH role? There are six leads (it’s a total ensemble, cast-driven film) and they have found some kickass boys to play the “standard horror genre” parts (i.e. the Hero, the Pretty/Dumb One, the One Nobody Likes, the Doomed to Die First One, etc.)… most of these guys are the ones who were at the audition a few weeks back. I spent 2 hrs sprawled out on the floor of the B&Noble @ Union Sq. with the director of the film, spilling ideas and input about all kinds of shit. Apparently, I am something of a “wild card” in the casting setup, they’re not quite sure HOW they want to use me in this film… they just now they wanna create something different for me.. I get to be “the Project”. So over the next few months, the other boys and myself will be working and meeting with the producers and screenwriter as they personalize the roles to what they think we would best inhabit. It’s terribley exciting for me, as an actor, to be part of that kind of process and have my actual persona studied and woven into a character written specifically for me to play. And how much fun will it be, dudes, to make a campy movie about killer disco zombies and shoot it @ this beautiful palace on the beach? Even cooler, the production just got some SERIOUS industry backing from the people behind that short film series Boys Life, which means a world of BIG POSSIBILITIES — namely, yours truly getting finally some mouth-watering indie cred (and hopefully, a cult-like following AT LAST)! Somebody tell Jeremy Davies there’s a new face on the scene. Oh, and Parker Posey? I’ll be taking the crown from you right about now. Hee.
Oh, imagine my utter humiliation when I realized today that there is a security cam setup in the service elevator @ work. A security camera that has been there for God knows how long and has captured God knows what. This blow of reality did not hit me, of course, until AFTER I’d already shaken my ass, watched myself, and shown them what I was working with.
In a purely selfish and lame attempt @ looking “cool and connected,” I helped a spritely young lad dance his way into the Hudson Bar last night. Normally, I never do that but something about this kid made me wanna be his hero, baby. Firstoff, he was a ridiculously scene-stealing Metroboy, which takes moxie and (when done right) demands respect. He’d totally caught my eye earlier that evening and I’d been hoping to chat with him. He looked EXACTLY like me when I was 19 and fresh to to Manhattan. Tiny little guy, spikey blond hair and clubkid gear on, looking to play things up, totally wanting to be seen at the coolest spots around the city. Hmmm… guess not much has changed in the last 5 years. Even freakier? his name was Chris. (
)
My mission is clear: I must find this young boy of sprite and warn him of the dead-end dangers awaiting him. Drop the game, kid! Find a hobby! Resist the persuit of urban hip and trendiness, it’ll get you NOWHERE! Throw away all of your club fliers and hair gel and change your name to Ishmael! SAVE YOURSELF! Run screaming into the void! Run screaming into the void! *deep breath* Ok, pardon the hysterics. I’ve been watching Donnie Darko again and everything just seems little INTENSE @ the moment.
(Don’t throw stones, winners, I was only kidding about Parker and Jeremy. I will never be as cool as they. Those coolkids both rock and I know this).
Weathering Manhattan
March 22nd, 2003The city burns warm and bright all day long and then turns slick and soaking at night. From hi to lo, from back to forth and up and down. I, for one, am getting a little sick of it. My only consolation is that this WeatherPixie kid looks eerily familiar.
(No, my narcissism knows no bounds.)
Baz
March 21st, 2003A guy in a faded green U Mass sweatshirt came up up to the front desk tonight @ work.
Spriteboy: “Good evening. How are you?”
Guy: “Fine and yourself?”
S: “Doing well. What can I do for you?”
G: “What’s the situation with Baz tonight?”
S: “I’m sorry, sir?”
G: “I’m looking for Baz. What’s happening with that here tonight?”
S: “With… Baz?”
G: “Yeah.”
[I had to take a minute and check the Special Events sheet for the hotel that night. I remember we'd recently hosted the opening night after-party for La Boheme, so I though maybe Baz Luhrman was doing a press junket in the hotel or something. I scanned over the list, looking for something related to Bazmark. No luck.]
S: “Okay, sir? I’m sorry but I don’t have any of that information here at the front desk.”
G: (giving me a weird look) “Nothing?”
S: “Sorry. Nothing about a Bazmark event tonight.”
G: ”No. Baaaaaaz.”
S: (getting annoyed — who the hell did this guy think he was?) “Riiiiight. Nothing scheduled. Sorry.”
G: “Isn’t THAT one right over there?”
[I follow his gaze... to the fucking HudsonBAR. 
]
S: (turning red) “Ohhh, the bars. Okaaaaaay. Now I gotcha. Yes, sir, the Hudson BAR is open tonight till 3am.”
G: (shakes his head, walking off) “What a little prick…”
S: (banging face against the desk) “WHY, GOD?! WHYYYY?!“
Just another shining example of why Spriteboy should not be allowed to interact with normal ppl. Ever.
Joygasm
March 20th, 2003I was @ 14th St. tonight on my way home and suddenly spotted these. I whipped out my camera and spent the good part of the following half hour running through the station, taking pictures. How long have they been there and why have I never noticed them before?! I hope they don’t mind that I’ve put down in words how wonderful life is now they’re in the world.
It’s the little things in life, ppl.