W
January 13th, 2007 / 1 comment »
W Union Square
I wandered around work this morning, snapping shots of the hotel to send my parents (I think they imagine I work at a stuffy place), and they came out kinda cute so I’m posting them here. I spend 40hrs a week at this property, usually getting caught up in a whirlwind of work, and at the end of the day I just wanna get the hell out and run screaming into the streets. But occassionally I have a really nice, slow day — like today — and I remember what a beautiful place it is, and how happy I am to part of the ambience.
Been pondering the decision to move forward @ work. There’s an opportunity to enroll in a 6month training program (just one day a week) that lets me observe and crosstrain different areas of the company. I’ve always had a mild interest in learning more about the Sales Department, maybe Human Resources too, so this would be a great way to do that. Originally, I was going to do the program anyway but despite what I’m assured, I’m pretty you are only accepted into the program with the idea/expectation that you’re looking to take a promotion once you complete. This is why I’m 80% set on not doing it afterall.
My mom would tell me that I’m letting my “fear of success” hold me back. It’s a keen observation but not so much the case. Can I just say I would totally kick ASS running things in this industry? I’m AMAZING @ what I do, I love my job and I could see myself lasting a long time here; running a hotel is something I could see myself doing and enjoying. But I’m just not sure I want to. Truth is, I’ve upgraded my way to a plum position as Concierge — despite the pressure of playing Perfect Host to millions of travellers you get better pay, perks, and esteem than most of the managers (and sometimes more power). I feel like I got really fortunate landing my position and it would just be stupid to let my spot go, especially when this isn’t quite the career I’ve got my heart set on. Don’t ask me what I really want to do, it’ll bring on a big mess of tears and sputtering confusion. Let’s just stick with the topic at hand.
I’m still thinking about it. Do I want to move forward here? Not sure yet. In the meantime, it sure is pretty.
Whiff
January 12th, 2007 / 1 comment »It’s amazing how one nekked homeless man, with ungodly stink practically steaming from his ass, can bring my peaceful 6am power nap on the subawy to a screeching halt. I’ve never woken up with such a jolt, or ever seen a train empty out so fast. Really gross. Nevertheless, I do believe that my sinuses have been burned clean; no more allergies. There’s a silver lining in everything, I guess, even in the reeking derelict.
And this is how we begin our morning in New York. Happy Friday.
My Big One
January 10th, 2007 / 3 comments »P popped into my world a year ago today. He’s had my attention, affection, and heart ever since. He’s become my best friend. We went to an incredible dinner tonight @ QM. He looked adorable in his striped sweater. I watched him while he made chitchat with our waiter (he’s always doing that — his grassroots, we’re-in-this-together mindset), asking questions about the menu and sharing war stories, and I just smiled and thought, He’s mine.
We’d originally had other plans. We were going to have dinner, see Grey Gardens, and maybe head downtown to Lips in the West Village, where we had our first date. But earlier today he called and said he didn’t sleep well last night, wasn’t feeling very good, could we just do dinner instead? I understood and played it cool but I gotta say, I was dissapointed… which led to being secretly annoyed. I’d been all excited all week about our special night and built it up in my head, that it needed to be AMAZING and decadent to be memorable memorable — like our 6month celebration had been. Then I realized I was being exactly the kind of boyfriend I hate, the kind who thinks lavish grand gestures speak louder than quality time.
I assist ppl like this all the time @ work; guys trying to plan the “perfect” romantic suprise — private helicopter rides, rosepetals in the limo, best table at the top restaurant in the city. I stand behind my desk @ work and watch these men and always wonder how long it will take before they realize they’ve gotten completely tangled up in their own ideas of what they think makes a romantic evening, and I imagine their poor girlfriends having to endure this lavish production when maybe all they really want is to spend the night together in bed with all her favorite takeout around them watching all their favorite movies. It’s not really at all about doing what you THINK is romantic, but doing what you know your Other Half finds romantic. I’m so glad I went through my little mood though, cuz it made me pull right out of that bullshit and just enjoy the night with my boyfriend.
One year. My first real anniversary. Finally broke past that 9- month mark that’s always left me broken and sad in the past. One year and he’s still here, smiling at me with those eyes and that laugh. One could say I deserve him, but even I know how lucky I am to have him to love, and to be loved back just as hard.
Hold the Bacon
January 9th, 2007 / 2 comments »Robin Williams has ruined my entire night.
I watched The People’s Choice Awards tonight, cuz I’ll watch anything featuring Queen Latifah and her boobs, and I just lovehate it when celebrities go into cheesy mode and start referring to their fans as “the people” (i.e. “This award means so much because it’s coming from The People.”). They cut to this backstage clip of Robin Williams being asked if people always expect him to be funny, and he said some woman recently came up to him @ the airport and said, “Be zany!” Then he goes, “It’s kinda like going up to Ned Beatty and saying, ‘You sure got a purdy mouth. Squeal like a pig! Go on! Wheeeeeee! Wheeeeee!’.” He was being really funny and animated and everybody was laughing and I had no clue what he was talking about.
I know Ned Beatty as Otis in Superman and was in Purple People Eater and Back to School, stupid funny movies. So I google the “squeal like pig” phrase and find that it’s a famous line from the movie Deliverance, which I never saw. Did a YouTube search for the movie and…
Oh God. My eyes. Trauma. I’m not even going to link you to the clip.
So apparently, the whole famous line comes from a scene in the movie where 2 crazy mountain men tie this guy to a tree and make him watch while they RAPE his buddy, poor Ned Beatty, like a prison bitch in the mud. That’s where the “Squeal like pig!” line plays out… and it’s NOT funny. They strip him naked and make him snort and grunt and squeal and oh my god I can’t even type this out. How the hell was Robin Williams joking about that dialouge, with the pig noises and shit? The movie is 30-something years old but still, man. Rape and bestiality aren’t that funny. Robin Williams, what the hell is the matter with you?
Ned Beatty, if you are reading this I just want you to know that I’m sorry. Just so sorry. I want to give you a hug and let you know that Robin does NOT speak for me. If I could turn back time, if I could find a way I’d take back those words that hurt you and you’d stay. Keep your head up, buddy. I was never a big fan of pork anyway.
Weekend Recap
January 8th, 2007
Cozy
January 8th, 2007 / No commentsAfter a plentiful trip to Target this evening, I began ritually unpacking the fruits of my shopping.
P grabbed the camera and started filming me, hoping to catch a cute candid domestic moment. Being the attention whore I am, it is physically impossible for me to spot a camera and NOT ham it up a bit. That’s him being cute and that’s me wanting to make it dirrty.
UPDATED: Pay no attention to the mini-gut hiding behind my t-shirt. In a few weeks it will be disposed of with no traces left behind. “74lbs is the perfect weight!” Anorexia is process.
Babble & Breathe
January 5th, 2007(In Bed)
January 5th, 2007 / No commentsTaurus: You have pushed your limits and now that you have gotten into the full swing of things, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s possible, however, that you are just spinning your wheels off sheer habit, unable to recollect your original drive. Stick to your plan and keep plowing ahead; you will reach your Nirvana and remember your reason for coming.
Hot. Always nice when you plow ahead till you hit Nirvana and then remember why you came. Never tried sex on a swing or whatever “wheel-spinning”is but sounds like fun. Also sounds like I should stretch first and maybe wear a helmut. (Hee. I’m 12.)